I've been holding up pretty good. Until today. I can't stop crying. I don't know if I'm doing the right thing. I don't know if every thing will be okay. I don't know if I can live so far away from my two oldest kids. I don't know if Elise can be so far away from me. I don't know if Erika will make good friends that will have good influences on her. I don't know if Bryce can live so far away from Brandon. I don't know if I'm crazy for moving so far away from my sister and her cute boys. I don't know how much longer I can wait for Jeff's project to take off and start making money. I don't know if I can live so far away from all of my dear friends. I have never lived outside of Utah. I don't think I can make it through all of these changes, all at the same time. ....Seperately, maybe.
As many of you know, I have been anticipating moving for quite some time. As you may, or may not have heard, I am moving to Arizona. The moving truck is arriving tomorrow, (well, later today). Tonight will be my last night in my bed, in this house. (Although I will still be sleeping here for a little bit longer, just without my bed.) All the bedroom sets are being loaded onto the truck tomorrow and will be heading to Phoenix. (the first of probably about three loads and trips) I'm selling lots of our things. I sold my favorite entertainment center, and Brandons bed, because they wont fit in Phoenix. I've been having yard sales every Saturday. I'm packing up only what I use and selling everything else.
My sweet, beautiful Elise is graduating from High School on Thursday. She graduated from Seminary last Sunday. She will be staying with a friend this summer and then going to Snow College.
My first born, angel son is getting married on July 11th. Yes, of this year. He and Venessa will start Their lives together and stay here in Utah.
Jeff and I will move to Arizona with 2 of our 4 children. I know people have done this before. But I don't want to. I don't want to grow up and have to let my kids grow up and not live with me. I don't know if I can do it. I don't know. .......I can't stop crying......
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About Me
- Shar
- Bluffdale, UT, United States
- I feel like the luckiest girl in the world. I've been married to Jeff - the love of my life, for almost 21 years. I'm the mother of four beautiful and amazing kids. Brandon is 19, Elise is 17, Erika is 14 and Bryce is 11. I love to spend time with my family, go to movies, play games, go to movies, go out to eat and go to movies. I love diet cherry coke, music, especially soft rock and religious music. I hate grumpy people, bad service and other people's hands in bags of potato chips. I love to go on Cruises...Oh, and I really love to go to movies!
My cute hubby!
Brandon
Elise
Erika
Bryce
12 comments:
I wish I had more time right now to say more, but I will say that I'll be thinking about you all day while I'm at "work" and praying for you to have peace.
I'm sorry it's so hard. With little ones I obviously can't understand what you're dealing with exactly at this moment. I just know that very recently I've said, "I can't do it; it will be too hard." But it turns out I'm stronger than I thought I was. And it turns out that the Lord heard me and answered my prayers.
Sharla, I just wish I was there so I could give you a big hug and make it all better. I am so sorry you are going through all of this. Change is so hard. I hated, hated enterprise when I first moved here and missed everyone so much. In the long run it has been the best thing for our family. I don't know how to help but I am here anytime you need me. I love you guys.
Love Michele
Oh Sharla! I'm so sorry! You're right, change is so so so hard! I have held on until my fingernails cramped and then held on some more because I hate change so much...but Heavenly Father always seems to comfort me and bless me with the peace I've needed to keep moving forward.
I will pray for you to have that same peace. I will be thinking of you. You can do it--Karina's right, we're ALL so much stronger than we think we are. Good luck with everything!
Oh, and one more thing I had to add...I know in all your moving you may not have a chance to visit Liz's lovely blog today, so I'm going to post her amazingly applicable post for you to check out when you have some time. It's beautiful:
http://nylizzy.blogspot.com/2009/06/reasons-to-love-not-hate.html
Sharla--you feel weak and yet your actions are strong. I admire your ability to see what is truly important--your family-and let go of the less important--all the things we sometimes mistakenly put so much value on. I know your family will be blessed with tremendous growth and opportunity on the other side of this trial. I will be praying for you.
Congrats to Elise. I'm always delighted to hear when teens graduate from seminary. It takes a lot of sacrifice to do that, and gives them such a strong foundation for life. And how fun to look forward to Snow College!!
Congrats also to Brandon! I'm happy that he has found happiness with Vanessa and wish them well.
I didn't know Brandon was getting married.... and I didn't know you were moving, either! What a change! If it's any consolation, I never imagined I'd leave there, either, and Trish never left Utah and now we're both in love with our someplace different. It will be a great experience for you. I know it. I'm sorry things didn't work out the way you wanted. love you.
Oh, wow, you made me cry too. It's just so dang hard to make changes! Now another one of my kids is moving away (see Rhyetta/Matt's blogspot) and it'll just be me and Wo stuck down here in St. George, so we'll probably move too. Hope I'm as strong as you are when the time comes...
Phoenix is awesome, tell Nate and Malena hello for me!
SIS! I'm so sorry that you're having such a hard time. I know I told you I wouldn't ever tell you it's okay that you're leaving me, but I guess if I write it than it isn't the same thing as saying it, right? SO....It's okay, we'll be okay and you're going to be great. It's going to be such a wonderful fresh start for you, in the warm Arizona sun, your big kids will come and visit a lot, and your little ones will love it too I know they will. You make friends with the bank tellers of your bank, and in line at the grocery store, you're going to have more friends and things to do by the end of summer that you're not going to know what to do. I KNOW things will be okay. We'll be okay too and we promise we'll come visit. I LOVE you!!
Now, let's just pretend I didn't just write all that so I can go on acting mad at you for leaving me. K? :)
I love you!
Our greatest growth comes with change. We have lived here 25 years, the longest I have ever lived anywhere. And at times I miss the opportunity to move and experience so many new things. Each move in my life has helped me grow. Today there is so much technology available that distance doesn't seem as bad as it used to. I knonw all this advise from your loved ones will help soon. But it might take a bit before you can handle it. For now, just cry. I did when we moved from St. George and I thought I would never ever ever recover. But time is a great healer and teaches many lessons. I feel so bad too. So many Pearson's are moving. Soon we will hold a shower or wedding and have 40 people there instead of 100. Now that is a small number for Pearson's. We sure love you and wish you the very best.
Yeah, moving away from home--even to a new home--is waaaay hard. I cried a lot when we left So. Cal.--and ended up truly depressed for a while. But we've made a new home, and we're happy, happy, happy!
You'll be okay . . . eventually. :)
Hey second mom I hope your tear glands give you a rest sometime soon :) The only thing I know for sure about all this is that I'm going to take care of your big girl while you're gone!! Especially at school :D And then, we will drive our butts down there and visit you! Can we please have our princess party we never had before you leave town for reals?? I am going to miss you guys like crazy crazy crazy. Thank you for helping raise me, you will ALWAYS have a special place in my heart. I love you to death and am thankful to be one of your "daughters." LOVE YOU!!!
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